December to January

It's somehow hard to start writing now. After coming back from Japan my life changed quickly and I would say a lot. I have been surprisingly busy to the point this has felt like someone else's life. And what's even more weird is that I have felt happiness. God knows how long it has been since the last time I didn't fake to be okay all the time lying to myself and other people. Of course I'm not magically instantly better and happy but this is a start for that hopefully. I must admit I had to　believe in myself instead of believing other people's expectations and following what they would have wanted just for the sake of keeping them as a friend. Kept in short there was a huge mess of misunderstandings and rumors and people not even included in the case turning towards others because they believed they knew what had happened. It's funny how some people can be so mean. At least it's okay now and I can forget the whole mess and deal with the changes it caused towards good things. 

First I must announce that I finally have my own apartment! It's cheap for a apartment for one. There is a bathtub that I absolutely love, place for my laundry machine, walk in closet and a lot of space to mention a few. I'll show some pictures later maybe. My new bed arrived and it's comfortable to sleep on. Before there was two mattresses on the floor and it was getting annoying having them slide apart all the time. I also bought a new bigger TV and a surround speaker so it's more luxurious than I have ever had at home. Watching movies is on a whole new level. I should do some drape shopping soon as well. The minus side is the location that's a bit aside from the downtown area. I got the problem solved for a moment and I now have a descend red car that's fun to drive when I'm not too nervous. Feels more free than without it because I can go wherever I want whenever I want. And I like the feeling of adulthood that I experience when driving to the grocery store.

I spent Christmas with my other half, family and relatives in Hämeenlinna and Helsinki this year. I was a bit nervous to show around the place where I grew up but it was totally okay. Well in Helsinki my mom tried to be once again difficult like she is sometimes and ruined my evening but I stayed calm because I didn't want to cause a scene. New Year went by spending time with other relatives back here in Vaasa. It might have been the best New Year experience I have ever had. I'm able to enjoy things too much lately! It's weird.

Let's hope this'll be the best year so far! I'll promise to try harder at school too now that I have kind of  a personal tutor all the time with me ;)